I wish I had read that line in the Glamour article a few days ago when I really needed someone to bring me to my senses. I went through a really rough patch and, looking back... I guess the main culprit was me. I worry, constantly, and to the point that it adversely affects my happiness and my relationships. I will pick up and the slightest signs and let them snowball in my head into big catastrophes:
"Why did he say that? Does that mean he doesn;t love me... Is he going to leave me... Am I going to end up alone?"
"He is drooling over that blond on TV ... he;s always been obsessed with blonds. He's going to cheat one me and I am going to be heartbroken... Worse, he is going to dump me for a slutty blond and I will end up alone and miserable...What if I dye my hair blond... My hair is weak, it wont take it and then it will fall out and then he'll leave me anyway and I will be bald and alone..."
Well, you get the picture. I get in my own way constantly and I should learn how not to. It is hurting me, and it could hurt everything I am so afraid of loosing. I don't just worry, but I also get mad at those who could potentially do such horrible things... sort of like preemptive anger I guess... which doesn;t make much sense to them. So I think it is wonderful advice: I don;t have to tell myself all these horrible stories. They are not real and chances are they won;t happen. All this worrying might actually make them happen and I do not want to fuel any self-fulfilling prophecies. So today, I am making my first resolution (yeah, I know, it is way past New Years but I never make New Years resolutions so this should still count). I am vowing to stay out of my head, stop getting in my own way and let tomorrow worry about tomorrow. Life's too short to worry about potential horrible what ifs. There are real problems that are worth worrying and hypothetical problems do not count.
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1 comment:
I do this a lot too. The "what if" ruins the "what is."
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